KISS-AN-ELF (Or Hobbit. Human. Whatever.) ADVICE AND GUIDANCE "The Young Elf's Handbook" - A guide to courting and wooing. FUNNY BONES Animated music videos ("Lord of the Dance", "The Singing Legolas") and more ELF ON A SHELF UNIVERSE Staff / Erestor's biography and photo album / Last Homely Gallery / Ballad of Fin, the Balrog Slayer and more BEAUTY, HEALTH-CARE, HOBBY AND RECREATION Photomanipulations, Elf-Ads etc. GALLERIES Elrond, Haldir, Legolas, Elves, Orlando Bloom Gallery, Midsomer Murders, Graham Norton, TLR. Pirates of the Caribbean, Hugo Weaving ARTICLES Archive for all Lord of the Rings-related articles I wrote. GAMES THINGS YOU SENT US LINKS WEBRINGS GUESTBOOK MAIL US |
VANILLA ELF Slash, het and gen, rating green to orange, humour, drama, angst and nonsense. Emphasis is put on plot and characters, not on the action between the sheets ("how boring!") - what can I say? It is not called "The most boring life of Master Erestor of Rivendell" without a reason. "DID YOU JUST CALL ME MITZI?!?" - LORD ELROND'S LETTERBOX The very popular letters to and from Lord Elrond have a new home. Gen, humour, rated green to blue. |
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We are the first place in Rivendell when it comes to all things useless, nonsensical, weird and entertaining. "A smile a day keeps the healer away", as Master Elrond uses to say, and who are we to argue with him. Our shop is easy to find - just opposite the embassy of Lothlórien. We are open 24/7, our staff is friendly and will answer any questions you might have. Stables for your horses are available, please ask the Elf on duty. Do not forget to stop at our chain stores in Calas Galadhon and Minas Tirith. Mirkwood shop is now open, under new management of Princesses Liritar and Veet. We wish you a pleasant shopping experience." Master Erestor o.t.c.r., scribe |
ELF ON A SHELF The best aroma therapy shop in Rivendell! Est. February 15, 2003 Proprietor: Mauburz the Straggler (Orc, ret.) Share holders: Erestor, Glorfindel & sons By appointment to Lord Elrond |
FAN FICTION (YOU ARE LEAVING ELF ON A SHELF): |
Lord of the Rings and all its characters belong to Tolkien and his estate, the movies to New Line Cinema and half a million of other people I'm not listing here, but I'm sure they know neither copyright infringment is meant nor disrespect nor anything else sue-able, and over all, I'd rather be in Kansas. This website is in no way associated with any of the above mentioned companies and organisations. Copyrights and trademarks for the books, films, articles, and other promotional materials are held by their respective owners and their use is allowed under the fair use clause of the Copyright Law. Design and original photography and artwork however are copyright by Elf on a Shelf. This website is a parody. I am not responsible for the content of any of the sites I link to, nor for the content of any of the sites the linked-to sites link to, nor for any other darn site on the internet but mine. All the original artwork is MINE MINE MINE. All cartoons by Mäkka appear here with permission of PK Webzine and may not, under any circumstances, be used anywhere else. This website is hoovered daily and polished once a week by Mauburz The Straggler, Master Erestor and Lord Glorfindel. As for stealing my stuff - hey, you really want to rise the anger of an Orc who runs an aromatherapy shop in Rivendell?!? |
PK Webzine 8 Interviews: Craig Parker (Haldir), Jørn Benzon (Rúmil), Nathaniel Lees (Uglúk), Jonathan Harding (Erestor) |
OUR CHARITY OF CHOICE: |
If you enjoyed this website and wish to make the webmasters happy, please take the time to visit DOCTORS WITHOUT BORDERS ÄRZTE OHNE GRENZEN MÉDECINS SANS FRONTIÈRES and make a donation. Every donation counts and could save lives. We are privileged - time to share some of our good luck. Thank you. Master Erestor o.t.c.r. and Mauburz the Straggler |
DISCLAIMER: |
PUBLIC ANNOUNCEMENT |
In what shall go down in history as "Ye grand diary-x debacle of 2006", diary-x, where all of Master Erestor's tales as well as our updates were posted, died a horrible death by incompetence of the owner (a certain Stephen Deken). Incompetence = not doing any backups. All was lost, including the money Master Erestor had paid for a total of 5 accounts. Master Erestor was not amused. By now, all content has been restored. If you should find a broken link somewhere, please let us know so that we can fix it. |