Sci-Fi Channel reported:

"Tourists Seek Middle-earth

Tourists have been trying to book passage to destinations in Middle-earth, apparently not realizing it's the fictional setting of J.R.R. Tolkien's Lord of the Rings, the Sydney Morning Herald reported. Staff members at the Yahoo! Travel Web site told the newspaper that places featured in Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings films and Tolkien's books, such as Mordor and Rivendell, have become popular search terms on the site.
"Personally I'd never want to go to Mordor. The film's real location, New Zealand, on the other hand, is a truly magical place," Yahoo.co.uk travel producer Morgan Williams told the Herald.

Scenes of Mordor in Jackson's movies were filmed in New Zealand's Tongariro National Park, Kaitoke Regional Park stood in for Rivendell and the Southern Alps on the New Zealand's South Island doubled for the Misty Mountains."
Disclaimer:

For full disclaimer, please see the front site of ELF ON A SHELF. But by now, we are sure, you figured out this page is a parody.
Send messenger for further information and bookings.
Vilya Card and Lothlorien Express NOT accepted. We only take cash (silver, white gems) or wine (2948 2nd Ager prefered).
Final price consists of basic fee, taxes, tolls and booking fees.
Ruled wisely by our beloved and much admired king, His Royal Highness, Thranduil the Exceptional and Impressive, Most Splendid and Feared Ruler of Mirkwood, King by the Valar's Grace, Ruler of 2000 Years, Shining Star of Greenwood The Green, Fairest of all Elven Lords, Light of the Dark Ages, Son of Oropher the magnificent, etc. etc. etc., Mirkwood has become the "In-Spot" for travellers who seek for the exceptional and exclusive.

For many millenia, we have kept to ourselves. We saw no need for Noldor, Dwarfs, Halflings or, the Valar forbid, Humans to trample through our woods, ruin the mushrooms, scare the deer and make moo-moo eyes at King Thranduil's youngest son.

On the other hand, His Royal Highness is not completely objecting the concept of exchanging hospitality for wealth.

So come then, if you really must.
"Shelob-Tour"

You thought Orcs were scary? Then take part in one of our weekly spider hunts. Under the guidance of experienced spider-hunters you can try your skills with bow and arrow on our famous Wood Spiders.
Are you Elf enough to take up this challenge?

Please note: antidote against spider bites is not included in the fee and will cost extra. Bring your own or make sure you have an insurance covering this kind of injuries.

Bow and arrows will not be provided, but can be hired for a small, additional fee plus taxes plus deposit.
"Archery for Experts"

You might be the best archer in your own realm, which is about as meaningful as being the best soccer team in Mordor, but we assure you there is still a trick or two to be learned from His Royal Highness, Prince Legolas, son of  our beloved and much admired king, His Royal Highness, Thranduil the Exceptional and Impressive, Most Splendid and Feared Ruler of Mirkwood, King by the Valar's Grace, Ruler of 2000 Years, Shining Star of Greenwood The Green, Fairest of all Elven Lords, Light of the Dark Ages, Son of Oropher the magnificent, etc. etc. etc.

- How to hit the target though you're blindfolded
- How to hold your bow if you got no hand free
- How to shoot an arrow without getting it tangled up   in your braids
- How to remove an arrow who got tangled up in your braids without
   removing the braids
The Department for Politics at the Free University of Mirkwood offers, for a small additional fee, lectures on the following subjects:

- "Gil Galad - why the high-king of the Noldor is overrated"
- "Are the Galadhrim still needed?"
- "The Galadriel-Conspiracy"
- "Swan-ships and their negative impact on the environment"
- "The military superiority of Mirkwood"

Guest speaker: His Royal Highness, Thranduil the Exceptional and Impressive, Most Splendid and Feared Ruler of Mirkwood, King by the Valar's Grace, Ruler of 2000 Years, Shining Star of Greenwood The Green, Fairest of all Elven Lords, Light of the Dark Ages, Son of Oropher the magnificent, etc. etc. etc.
Following the demands of our time, and for a small additional fee, we now also offer workshops with a psychological background:

- "How to deal with difficult parents"
- "Father - Son conflicts"
- "Marriage - why to avoid it"
- "Beauty - blessing or curse?"

With meditation as well as in role-playing games and in-depth discussions we try to get to the bottom of your interfamiliar problems.

Hosted by Prince Legolas.
"WE MAKE FULL ELVES OUT OF PEREDHIL!"
ACCOMMODATION

Mirkwood has well-fitted caves on offer. Huts are available, and if you must sleep on a tree, by all means, do it, we have some self-catering Talans. Just make sure you don't leave any litter behind you, and bring your own bed linen.
FOOD AND BEVERAGE

We offer a special diet of lembas, fruit and wine. As we are all exceptionally good looking and healthy, we don't see much need to offer any other menus.
FUN AND LEISURE

Drinking contests are held every Tuesday in the Great Hall. Challenge our champions and win a hand-carved and personally signed statute of His Royal Highness, Thranduil the Exceptional and Impressive, Most Splendid and Feared Ruler of Mirkwood, King by the Valar's Grace, Ruler of 2000 Years, Shining Star of Greenwood The Green, Fairest of all Elven Lords, Light of the Dark Ages, Son of Oropher the magnificent, etc. etc. etc.
Please note: for security reasons (security of the prince) ABSOLUTELY NO FEMALES OF ANY SPECIES are allowed on this course.